The value of “having”

A lot of people, including me, focus on the things that they “lack” or they dont possess. Often those are reasons that disturb our inner peace/harmony and derails us from our paths. Love, money, success, fame, respect, friends. The things that we all want! But what exactly gives them value? The probability of not having them! The gap between “I dont have” and “I have” its the thing that provides pleasure and quality. Once we realize that on a deeper level, our fears lose ground and even evaporate. Being lonely, its what makes “love” possible. They cant exist without each other. You could apply this logic for almost everything. For example, most people dont aknowledge their hearing because its considered as something “given”. But if they lose it for some reason, they immediately would realize its value. Life is not about one thing, one situation, one month, one person or one love … its about the wide variation of choices. About moving on and not being stagnant. So the next time when we dont “have” something, instead of being disappointed and losing our balance, we could see it as a potential to create a gap, to create value. As the great Alan Watts said “Life its like a dance. Its not about reaching from point “a” to point “b”. Its about experiencing the distance between them.”

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Ego’s shortcuts

Motivated by its own agenda, the “Ego” aims to reduce the information coming from other senses. Instead, it provides us with its own cheaper coppies – “words”. Everything that doesnt include “thinking” we start to assume as unimportant, trivial and annoying. Give it enough time, most of our daily routines are branded as such. The “Ego” cant remove them completely, so it persuades us to either “speedrun” through them or not pay them much attention. A daily routine list:

  • Fixing your bed, brushing your teeth, taking a shower, tying your shoes, covering the distance between home and work, fitness, dropping your kids at school and so on

How many of those you are perfoming without being annoyed? Without wanting to be somewhere else and doing something more “meaningful”? A lot of people “dream walk” through them. Their bodies are doing the physical exercise while their consciousness go on a “mind” tour full of thoughts. The later, often enough are deprived from any weight towards your life or any possibility for them to actually happen: ” What if my best friend, who is a gay, sleeps with my wife? “

The Ego’s strategy for cutting you from reality. It creates a “dream” as far into the future as possible – making a family, collecting a diploma, having an “X” amount of money and so on. It fools us that those “dreams” possess a great value. We neglect our present,daily lifes and instead concentrate on thoughts about “that” one special future moment. We are unhappy but dont know the reason about it. Something inside of us rebels through emotions but the mind cuts it with something along the lines – “When that future “X” moment arrives, everything will change and I would live differently and be happy”. And often enough that comforts us for a while. One day we reach that goal, that goal that filled our mind and life for years. Only to find out that it brings us a very slim pleasure. We are left empty, all those years we werent chasing the actual goal but an illusion. She fueled us for so long that we cant live without it anymore. In order to survive, we create another longterm future goal.